Your friend is coming over to stay with you. However, you will be away on vacation for a month. Write him/her a letter and say:
– How to get the keys to your flat
– How to operate the equipment in the flat, and
– Suggest a few places of interest to visit
Hope finds you well. As I wrote to you in my previous letter, I am unable to cancel the finalised trip my parents. But, soon after you arrive in Melbourne, contact Jessie, a good friend of mine on 0425680256. She offered her help to pick you up from the airport and you can collect the key from her.
I must say that sometimes, the hot water geezer turns off automatically so, you might have to make sure it is switched on before having a shower. Also, the gas heater fixed in the lounge does not work, but you can use the oil heater in my instead.
If you have time you might enjoy visiting the Aquarium, the Queen Victoria Market and the Botanical Gardens as these places are not that far from where I live. I hope you are happy with this arrangement, but if you need more help or information please let me know.
All the requirements of the task were covered fairly well. The bullet points were mentioned, emphasized and illustrated in a suitable and logical way. The tone of this letter needs to be less formal. The ideas are presented in a logical order and all aspects of cohesion are taken care of well. The paragraphing is handled suitably and appropriately. Some sophisticated words/expressions are used in a clever way, with only occasional errors in word choice/expression choice. Most sentences are free of errors. Overall, seems worthy of Band 8.
Click here to see more IELTS letters of band 8