IELTS Essay, topic: Internet connecting people

Some people say that the Internet is making the world smaller by bringing people together. To what extent do you agree that the internet is making it easier for people to communicate with one another?

In today’s world due to the advancement of technology new inventions are coming into existence. It is true that ‘Necessity is a mother of invention’. Internet is just like a wonder box, which contains every type of information. it has also proved a very important tool to connect people with one another.

In today’s modernized era nobody has sufficient time to write letters to their loved ones. it also takes longer to send or receive any informationthe Internet is the easiest way to send messages to our loved ones. Communication can be either in the form of e-mail or through text messages sent via to mobile phones. We can send and receive messages straight .

today’s young generation mostly prefers to do chatting through the Internet. During such chatting we can write messages and get replies straight away. voice chatting is .

the advantages and disadvantages resemble two sides of one coin, also some downsides, causing people health problems poor eye-sight, back ache or migraines. Today’s teenagers usually prefer to spend their time on the internet rather than in other physical activities, which causing them to have a weaker physical health.

To conclude, I would like to say that the Internet is one of the most modernized and most successful tools, not only for regarding every field in a very short period of time.

This is a great essay, well done! Remember, ‘the Internet’ is a proper noun, currently, there is only one. Pay attention to your punctuation – many commas are missing after linking words. Otherwise, the essay is well argued and set out.

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,
The
Besides,
to be
Moreover,
, but
the Internet
away
On the other hand,
Moreover,
becoming more popular every day
In reality
so as any other thing the Internet
has
such as
including
to participate
communication, but also for getting the most relevant information

17 thoughts on “IELTS Essay, topic: Internet connecting people”

  1. Pingback: IELTS Essay Samples of Band 7 | IELTS-Blog

  2. I doubt the use of ‘rather than’ in the essay. You have changed ‘to participating’ into ‘participating’, but as long as I know the correct use in the essay should be ‘participate’. Seeing the entire sentence, “…. prefer to spend their time… rather than participate…”. I am concerned ‘rather than’ takes parallelism and in this case, it should be used without ‘to’. It’s confusing as what I know is different.

  3. Hi.I have a question.in this essay why the sentence “is going to be very popular …” is wrong?and another question,using both “besides” and ” as” is wrong?

  4. If you are looking at the essay on your computer, hold the mouse over the words underlined in blue (errors) and the correct version will appear. If you are viewing the essay on a mobile device, tap on the words underlined in blue to see the relevant corrections.

  5. Hi
    Can you please suggest me…if we agree one one point..can we make 1 paragraph for disagree..please clear this point..
    I m bit confused.

  6. there is one doubt that someone said me that starting the sentence with But is low band scorer …..Is that right??tell me

  7. It isn’t a great idea to start your sentence with ‘But’ and if you can avoid it, please do so. This is why one of our suggested corrections in this essay is to get rid of ‘But’ in the beginning of the sentence.

  8. Is it is a good idea to make one BP with one point including example and last lines of result ?
    Another BP with 2 idea with example and small conclusion ?

  9. ‘through text messages sent via internet to mobile phones.’
    I didn’t understand the correction in this sentence, how come ’sent via the internet’ makes sense?? Please explain..

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