IELTS Essays – Band 8

IELTS Writing – samples of IELTS essays of Band 8

IELTS essay, topic: Should people spend a lot on weddings and birthday parties?

Some people think that spending a lot on holding wedding parties, birthday parties and other celebrations is just a waste of money. Others, however, think that these are necessary for individuals and the society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Throwing parties can be expensive. While some people do not find these fancy gatherings worth what they cost, others believe such events are important to both individuals and the society.

People choose to throw parties for a number of reasons. For starters, they can make better teams. Project kick-off parties are good opportunities to break the ice and help team members to know each other better. Celebrating a victory create a sense of success and belonging. Companies do not see parties as of money and allocate budget to support such events; moreover, they often leave good memories. From our own experiences, we all have happy memories of our birthday parties when we were little. Every family has great photos at family gatherings in their album. In addition, contrary to what some people believe that spending on parties is a waste of social resources, they actually create value, either by employing people in the party-planning business or by offering people better experiences.

The popularity of parties, however, causes some tension in the society. They are hard on introverted people who find themselves uncomfortable in the crowd. This is a clinic symptom which psychologists call “social anxiety disorder”. There are other ways to celebrate important events that may have greater value for their cost. For instance, companies could send out gifts after successful projects and parents could take their children on family trips to celebrate birthdays.

In my opinion, while a party is a form of social event that brings many benefits to individuals and the society, other choices should also be considered, either to cut spending or to relieve the stress of those who are not fond of crowded celebrations.

This is a very good essay. Other than minor inaccuracies there are no problems (mouse over the words underlined in blue shows corrections). Seems to be worth IELTS Band 8.

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IELTS Essay, topic: the positive and the negative sides of globalization

Even though globalization affects the world’s economies in a positive way, its negative side should not be forgotten. Discuss.

In the present age, globalization is playing an increasingly important role in our lives. But in the meantime whether it is a blessing or a curse has sparked a heated debate. Some people argue that globalization has a fundamentally beneficial influence on our lives, while many others contend that it has a detrimental effect as well.

A convincing argument can be made about globalization not only playing a pivotal role in the development of technology and economy, but also promoting the cultural exchange between different countries. To start with, it is the globalization that impelled many to become international groups, thereby making a contribution to the local technology and employment. Specifically, when a multinational group a factory in a developing country, the new equipment, the new management skills and the job vacancies are all in the best interest of the local society. Moreover, people worldwide can get to know each other better through globalization. It is easy to see that more and more Hollywood blockbusters show cultures different from American, some recent examples are ‘Kungfu Panda’ and ‘The Mummy’.

Admittedly, the profit driven side of globalization has severely affected young people. Today, in the metropolises in different countries, it is very common to see teenagers wearing NIKE T-shirts and Adidas footwear, playing Hip-Hop music on Apple iPods and eating at KFC. The culture that took a thousand years to form just seems similar in these cities; it seems as though you can only distinguish them by their language. Meanwhile, in some developing countries, sweat workshops are always a concerning issue. For instance, reports show that some teenagers employed by NIKE’s contractors work in smelly factories over 14 hours a day, but are only paid fifty cents per hour.

To sum up, I would concede that globalization does come with some adverse effects. Despite that fact, benefits created by it far outweigh the disadvantages. Overall, I am convinced that we should further promote globalization and meanwhile the local government should take measures to combat culture assimilation and sweat workshops.

This essay is extremely long (338 words instead of the advised 250-265). It has a sound structure, your position is clearly expressed, the information is well-organized, and structure-wise the sentences are fine. The vocabulary is impressive and there were only a few grammatical errors (see comments underlined in blue). Overall, this seems to be a band 7.5 + essay.

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