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IELTS Essays – Band 8

IELTS Writing – Band 8 IELTS Sample Essays

IELTS Essay, topic: Some believe that modern technology is increasing the gap between the rich and poor, while others disagree (discuss)

Some believe that modern technology is increasing the gap between rich and poor people, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

There is no doubt that modern technology is reshaping our planet and affecting every aspect of human lives. From a social perspective, many people argue that the gap between the upper class and lower classes is widening as a result of technological advancements. Others, however, believe the opposite.

There are several reasons why one could think that the wealth inequality is, indeed, increasing. The most common reason is automation. Driven by technology, automation reduces the need for manual labour. As a result, less work opportunities are available for unskilled people. With each iteration of the cycle the competition increases and wages decrease. , technology has increased the minimum level of needs that should be satisfied. Nowadays, everybody should have a mobile phone and an internet connection, including the poor. This increases the monetary burden on them as they must borrow to cover these new needs.

However, I firmly believe that the aforementioned opinion is ludicrous. The most obvious reason is that modern technology has facilitated the road to riches in an unprecedented manner. For instance, many of the internet billionaires are from lower and middle classes. Moreover, the major leaps in agricultural technologies magnified food production. As a result, food has become more affordable and available. Finally, leveraging technology has dramatically increased workers’ productivity. Consequently, compensations and salaries have increased.

In conclusion, I strongly believe that technology could possibly narrow the difference between social classes. Increased food production, opportunities and productivity are just few examples of technology’s contribution to bridging the wealth gap.

This essay adequately covers all parts of the task. The ideas expressed in this written response are relevant, well-developed, ordered in a logical way and supported. The paragraphing is suitable and cohesion is maintained throughout the essay. A good range of vocabulary and the writer’s fluency are evident. There are no spelling errors and very few mistakes in word choice and grammar, most sentences are error-free. The essay is likely to get Band 8 in IELTS.

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‘the’ isn’t needed here
‘Secondly’ isn’t a good word choice because there is no ‘Firstly’, a better choice would be ‘Also’, or ‘In addition’
‘have’ is the correct verb form

IELTS essay, topic: Childcare training courses should be mandatory for all parents (agree/disagree)

Childcare training courses should be mandatory for all parents. Do you agree or disagree with this statement? Give your own opinion and include relevant examples.

It is true that parents need some knowledge and experience in order to raise their in an appropriate way. In this regard, many families attend different training courses. While I agree that these courses might be useful for some of them, I totally disagree with the recommended obligatory of such training.

On the one hand, training courses usually offered by governments could be very useful for those guardians who have a with special needs. For example, if a child has a birth defect or has been diagnosed with any mental or musculoskeletal disorders, these kinds of training could be lifesaving. Additionally, as we know, the first few months after birth are really a crucial period of a child’s life; parents should obtain different information related to their child’s vaccinations, common health problems, different developmental issues and so on, which can be delivered through such training courses.

On the other hand, I believe that making these programs a mandatory option would cause several problems for societies and individuals as well. To begin with, in order to achieve this goal, many professionals should be trained which may not be affordable for some governments. From an individual’s point of view, this kind of programs could be very time-consuming for some families who have other at home or who work long hours. The other important consideration is that parent training courses may not provide all the necessary information for each and every family. To be more specific, parents could get more beneficial information through different websites such as YouTube according to their own preferences.

In conclusion, although I believe that many families can take advantage training courses, I do believe that making them a compulsory option for everyone is too time and money-consuming for individuals and governments.

The introduction is very good and relevant. The writer’s position is balanced, relevantly and properly developed in two body paragraphs. The conclusion summarizes both sides of the argument and logically finished the essay. To maintain the necessary level of formality the word ‘kids’ should be replaced with ‘children’ everywhere in this essay. The use of prepositions needs more attention as some are inappropriate or incorrect. The length could be reduced – it’s not necessary to write a very long essay to get a higher score, and often it is better to write a shorter essay (no shorter than 250 words though!) but spend more time proofreading, correcting errors and improving the quality of writing. Overall this essay is likely to score Band 8 in IELTS.

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use the word ‘children’ to maintain the necessary level of formality in your essay
‘nature’ or ‘character’ is the right word to use here
‘as’ isn’t needed here
using the word ‘compulsory’ will help to avoid repetition of ‘mandatory’
use ‘children’ to maintain formality
‘of’ is the right preposition to use here
‘as’ isn’t needed here