IELTS Essays – Band 6

IELTS Writing – samples of IELTS essays of Band 6

IELTS Essay, topic: Learning about the past

Learning about the past has no value for those of us living in the present. Do you agree or disagree? Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer.

Evaluation of the importance of timing is essential, past to show the importance of their present, while that to even remember their past because it would not help them at all. It is a very controversial and complicated matter.

, many people believe this statement, for many reasons. Firstly, all of us had made many mistakes which we would not like to remember, they will affect their present because they can create some problems with our families example. Secondly, instead of remembering those past trials, one should get the benefits of their present.

Regardless of what I said previously, many people are sticking to their past to give themselves a push in their present. It can give a way of learning from mistakes, and a good chance to try to avoid anything that once lead to a past failure.

Moreover, success will not come without failure, everybody should make an attempt, even if it fails, and it may become a big success if they try it again and again. In addition, our past is our culture and heritage which we should not forget at all, it is a matter of value to our present and future, and will remain such till the day will die.

To sum up, in my opinion, we can not live without a past, it is our value of life. it can help create your experiences and solve your problems better in the future.

This essay is too short – it should be at least 250 words, writing less words means getting penalized. The structure of sentences needs work and so does the grammar. Do not address the “audience”, write in general (See the comments for the last sentence of the third paragraph). Overall, this looks like a Band 6 work. See comments underlined in blue for more details.

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Poor sentence structure, needs work
others show
there is no need
Again, poor sentence structure
in
for
a person
their
Besides,

IELTS Essay, topic: Globalization

Even though Globalization affects the world’s economics in a very positive way, its negative sides should not be forgotten. Discuss.

Everything has sides in the world, and so has the of globalization . The effects of globalization on the world economy are .

We must acknowledge that the negative effects are from a different kind than the positive ones. the negative sides, like low in less developed countries are important to .

If we take the Eurozone for example, the economic changes the process are huge. Many companies have transferred their factories into cheaper production to in the world . The results are rising unemployment rates in the “old industrial countries”.

In regard to the other countries on the world market, such as China, this job transfer is a big opportunity. But no one can that the consequences for the less developed countries where economy flourished, based on availability of cheap employees are highly important: globalization based on this facts brings problems.

Nevertheless, there are also . In general it is remarkable that there is a new tendency in “Thinking Global”. For instance, people are willing to more languages and get educated about cultures. Countries as undeveloped, such as India, are getting chances to be the in a certain field.

All in all it can be said that the effects of globalization are enormous. The of economic processes has changed completely. It is important to think in bigger terms, not just about the country. The positive things that this globalization process have brought us for the negative sides. The should be a world in balance, but this has yet to come.

This essay needs work. There are multiple spelling errors and unclear expressions (see comments underlined in blue). Also there are many words that are formed incorrectly (diverted instead of diverse, etc). There are too many paragraphs, all you need is 4 – 5 well-structured paragraphs, not 7 poorly structured ones. On the bright side, the task is covered and there are enough words (275), which is good. The paragraphs are logically connected and the linking words are used effectively. Overall, this looks like a Band 6 essay.

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two
process
remove this word
diverse
Therefore
wages
consider
caused by
globalization
areas
compete
markets
deny
environmental
positive effects to globalization
learn
other
formally known
leader
understanding
person’s own
must compensate
overall aim